closed btc long position, with a loss of -31k. went fully cash. moved the money out of my account.

leaving only 20k to have some skin in the game while learning perps trading. will return with a couple stacks of high society when my mental issues are resolved and i have found an edge in perps trading.

it makes no sense to bet usual bet size for me anymore here. future y22 must be protected from today's tilted y22.

thanks for all the support. see you around.

the only thing worse than playing on tilt is playing on tilt publicly

SM said smth similar.
and some other people i respect have told me the same before.

I'm gonna share with you a couple of thoughts as well as quotes from people infinitely smarter than me, then I'll fuck off.
Feel free to hit my DMs if you want.

"Being flat should be the default for a discretionary trader."

Would you act the same if you didn't share your journal in public ?
Look at every aspect of your trading in terms of EV, and cut out all the negative things/the noise.

I suppose the initial goal with journaling your trades in public was to share your journey and get a feeling of community, with perhaps additionally building accountability along the way.

You have performed well in terms of returns but at this point everyone knows and most importantly you know that your mind isn't in the right place at the current moment. I'd suggest you to stop whining in public and be accountable to no one else but yourself. As a man, why would you turn into a crybaby online ? I suppose you don't do that IRL, you own it and move on. Time to do the same in your trading.

I'm tired of seeing you say one thing and do the opposite for a whole year then whine about it : flipflopping and changing bias/thesis are different, one is triggered by emotions (=reactive mindset) while the other is motivated by a plan (=active mindset).

You have everything to succeed within yourself (courage, intelligence, perseverance) and capital. Yes, capital ! Protect it from yourself when needed.

"Everyone gets what they want from the market" (Ed Seykota)
You think what you want is money but a lot of times it's not the case.

"The methodology has to be ‘I don't want it too bad’ because self-imposed pressure is the biggest catalyst to paralyze your ability to maximize your talent" - Paul Annacone

😭😭

next post: I longed 1000 contracts of GIGGLE

i might be addicted. mi friends are telling me that. and it makes sense. i can‘t even log off for 24 hours, i can‘t live through a week without being in a position.

thats not good.

oh man, everyday waking up to fresh horrors

also a good point. maybe i am just lost. perps trading a new arena for me. i will figure it out.

You were like the neo of the trenches, riding momentum while managing to dodge all the bullets. Don't change that ser

Brother, imo your problem is you're looking at flipflopping as a weakness. That was literally your biggest strength, being able to change your bias at the drop of a hat. Very few can do that